It Takes a Village

            I’ve always questioned the phrase “it takes a village” when referring to raising a child until now. I thought it was melodramatic to infer that a child required so many different people to raise them but looking back on my own experiences I realize how wrong I was. Two parents are not enough to raise a healthy child and one teacher is not enough to educate a child either. Education requires a community effort from teachers to coaches, counselors, friends, and parents. Everyone that is in the child’s life has an effect on not only their wellbeing but their education as well. By forming a supportive environment for each and every child, we can reduce all sorts of conditions such as behavioral problems, anxiety, and depression. These conditions distract students from the material we are trying to teach and become the central focus of the their young lives. With a community of support, each student will have somewhere to go to get answers or someone to talk to about their problems so when it comes time to learn something in the classroom, they are ready and willing. It also adds to the point that many of the UTEC students referred to: it will show them we care. By providing support for our students, we can show them that we care about their wellbeing and what is going on in their lives.

            Support is sometimes a tricky thing to provide. The simplest way to provide support for someone is listening. All it takes sometimes are open ears to help someone. It can also mean being available after school, playing games with students at lunch, attending games, or participating in community events such as bake sales. It may also mean bringing in breakfast to a morning class or setting aside time each week to discuss real world issues. For example, the Trayvon Martin case has been all over the news lately and has caused quite a stir across the country in regards to race and the justice system. Teenagers, the same age as Martin, may not know how to feel about these events and require a safe environment to discuss them. Opening up a weekly class discussion about big and small events in the students live will not only help them form their own support system but it will encourage them to speak up.

            I was lucky growing up. I had a wonderful support system in place long before I entered school. I had an educated and caring mother along with a few great friends and a big family. My mother was involved with town politics when I was twelve. Due to her public status, I was always asked about school or horseback riding or just my day. Police officers and firefighters would frequently wave to me or buy me a coffee in the morning. Since my mother became engaged in the town and even the school, I also became involved in the town. My town also published the honor roll in the paper each term. Every time my name appeared in the paper, I would hear congratulations for a week. Everyone was involved in not only my schooling but my wellbeing as well. It was definitely a very positive environment to grow and learn in. 

Sex Education: A 21st Century Nightmare

Sex education is a hot topic, not because of the implied content, but because of the missing content. In schools across the United States, kids are being taught that abstinence is best and that sex is for adults. Kids then walk out of those classrooms with more questions than they started with. Why is sex prohibited to us? What is so dangerous or secretive about sex? Will it give me some answers if I do it? By denying kids answers to simple questions, we are creating a temptation. Nothing is as tempting as a good mystery. Kids are like little detectives, always seeking out the answers to difficult questions. The problem in the education systems is that we do not answer any questions kids may have about sex. We should be teaching kids not only what sex is but why it is important to either wait or use protection. Teen pregnancy is a major issue in public schools. For some schools like Gloucester, teen pregnancy is so normal that they have a day care center in the school. I think another part of the problem is that we are not teaching kids what it means to be pregnant. We are giving them some biological look at what it means to be pregnant but that means nothing to them without some context. As part of sex ed, we should be talking about pregnancy and why it is better to be older. Giving students an egg to take care of for a week hardly qualifies as a wakeup call. Schools are still giving kids eggs or dolls to take care of as if that will somehow provide them with insight. Many kids take care of pets and therefore do not see the connection.

When I was in sixth grade, I remember they gave us an egg to take care of for one week. With the teacher’s signature on the bottom of the egg, there was no way to replace it if we broke it. It was so simple that I nearly forgot about that egg. I had placed it in a basket in my closet each day after school. I never really connected the activity with the message. I believe they were trying to teach me something about being responsible for something (or someone) else but it did not register. I think these "G rated" safe ways of showing kids what it means to be responsible for someone else are a joke. They are a way for the adults in the kids’ lives to get out of really talking to their kids. Many adults shy away from the sex talk and prefer to let the schools handle that sort of thing but thankfully for me my mother was not shy. She sat me down when I was twelve years old and said "In many cultures you are old enough to bear children and have a family, so you therefore are old enough to know what it means to be a woman." She proceeded to describe to me, in detail, my organs and men's organs, and what sex was, and what pregnancy was like, and what it was like to have a baby. At first, it was a horrifying conversation but as we progressed, I found it to be one of the best conversations I've ever had with my mother. 

I had a friend in high school that was not as lucky as I was. Her parents left the sex talk to the school thinking that they would handle any questions she might have. She had the same sixth grade egg class as me and of course she did not take anything away from it either. She dated a boy all through high school and was lucky that he was a smart cookie. He insisted on protection and even offered to pay for birth control if she ever wanted it. They broke up the summer before senior year and she ended up having a one night stand a few weeks after the break up. She was heartbroken and in her sadness made the worst decision of her life. She turned up pregnant eight weeks later. She managed to graduate high school, but barely. I remember feeling so awful going off to college while she sat home with a newborn. Her story is not as sad as it seems though. She loved her son and ended up marrying the guy. They have two kids now and seem very happy. She got lucky. Her parents were extremely supportive and helped pay for all the expenses. Not all teens that get pregnant get that kind of support. 

What About Femininity? It’s a Social Construct Too!

Kimmel’s article Masculinity as Homophobia was fantastic. It walked through each part of how development of masculinity in our culture has eventually lead to homophobia in the typical masculine man mindset. At points in the article I was relieved to see femininity included until he said “Women have different kinds of gender identity crises; their anger and frustration, and their own symptoms of depression, come more from being excluded than from questioning whether they are feminine enough” (Kimmel 127). Up until this point, I was convinced that Kimmel was going to give femininity a quick shot at the same idea. This rapid dismissal of women is deeply misinformed, however well intention it may be. Though women are different from men and struggle in different ways, he is incorrect in assuming that women do not have a similar fear of appearing too masculine or strong. The entire stereotype of “lotus blossoms” comes from the notion that women are supposed to be meek and docile. They are supposed to be these weak, fragile creatures that require the love and attention of a strong man. They are incapable of maintaining a career or a household and require a type of supervision. The social construct of femininity is just as crippling and stigmatizing as masculinity. In some ways, the concept of masculinity would not be so dangerous if it weren't for femininity and the stigmas attached to it. Masculinity is the preferred term because femininity is equated with someone of lesser value and capabilities.

            I think Kimmel had a chance to flip it around and support his argument by addressing the obvious ramifications of femininity. Though I largely agree with what he is saying, I do not agree with his assessment of the plight of women in this instance of navigating socially constructed norms and expectations. Though I do believe that he makes a valid argument for the construct of masculinity feeding into the epidemic of homophobia among otherwise good people, I think he ignores the direct link there is between masculinity and femininity and how they both create this dangerous situation. The notion of women in society and the type-casting that occurs within the gender directly relates to the fear of being associated with that kind of casting.
            As a kid, I was always a tomboy. I never really associated with the feminine characteristics defined by society but associated more with some of the masculine ones. When I hit puberty and my tomboyish behavior became a means of isolating me from my peers, I realized that the definitions of masculinity and femininity were extremely limiting. They left no room for individuality among the genders. As a young woman, I was constantly worrying about not being feminine enough and not having desirable, “womanly” qualities and that worry led to some pretty serious issues with how I perceived myself and it dictated how I treated myself. The idea that men are the only ones that worry about these social constructs is indicative of the larger problem at hand. Mankind creates these social concepts and expectations that we then cannot meet and somehow that causes us to create these stigmas and stereotypes that in turn harm us. We create the very system which hurts us and yet we cannot recognize that not only did we create our own problems with each other but we cannot see the shared nature of our problems. 

Racist Attitudes Are Not Solely a White Affliction

I found Unraveling the “Model Minority” Stereotype fascinating. Though logically I know that not all immigrants from Asia are the same, I had falsely assumed that Asian American was an appropriate term. At the beginning of the novel, Lee describes how she was unaware of the cliques that existed and how many of the teachers are the school were still unaware of the student’s preference: “…several teachers informed me that the Asian American students had split themselves into two groups: Koreans in one and all other Asians in another” (Lee 667). Lee discovered that there were actually four distinct groups: Korean-identified, Asian-identified, Asian American-identified, and New Wave Asian-identified. By spending time immersing herself in the students’ lives, she is able to see that they do not see themselves the way others do. It was disappointing that the teachers at Academic High did not spend enough time with their students to realize that they identified themselves differently than society identified them.

I found the mentalities behind each identity to be the most interesting element of the novel. The Korean-identified students placed themselves above all other Asian students and certain non-Asian students: “Underlying conversations regarding Korean difference and superiority was a conversation about social class” (Lee 707). I found it shocking that Koreans wanted to distance themselves so much from other Asians and anyone who were perceived as a lower class. They were deeply averse to anyone who was on public assistance or welfare as if it was a contagious disease. They frequently expressed elitist attitudes about who they deemed worthy enough to include in their social circles or even conversations. They purposely sought out relationships with white students so that they could learn and imitate their behavior. Their parents encouraged them to become assimilated and to climb the ladder of social class through success.

The Korean-identified students’ attitudes made me realize that the stereotypes and racist attitudes do not solely exist outside of a targeted group. Even among ethnically linked groups there is racism and damaging attitudes that promote the continuation of hurtful stereotypes. The Korean-identified students promoted the model minority stereotype because they believed it gave them an edge in American society. This attitude may have been perpetuated from their parents and the fact that most Korean immigrants come from wealthy or educated backgrounds. Each group had a specific attitude toward the other Asian groups. Some were racist or stereotypical attitudes while others were supportive. More often than not, the damaging attitudes persist between groups while the supportive attitudes disintegrate. 

The Importance of Understanding Race and Ethnicity

                White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Backpack was enlightening but not altogether surprising. The dysfunctions of our society are evident but there was little suggested to fix it besides resisting privileges. The problem I found with the piece was that it did not address disadvantages of "white trash" or advantages of "cultured African Americans." These opposite views were not represented in the discussion and did not contribute to a well-rounded discussion of the problems with racism in today's society.
               Racial Formation reminded me of the activity we did in class where we wrote down stereotypes surrounding certain race/ethnicity/sexual orientations. There were several layers of racism embedded in the results of our activity. Omni and Winant discuss the complexities of not only race but what constitutes racism. I was confused by their repeated reference to "racial projects" and had difficulty understanding what exactly they were referring to. I agreed and disagreed in equal parts with their definitions of what constituted racism. For example, they included whites in the discussion by saying "Whites can at times be the victims of racism-by other whites or nonwhites-as is the case with anti-Jewish and anti-Arab prejudice" (Omni 117). On the other hand, I found the explanation of the Asian American entrepreneur argument weak and misleading. In most cases I would find that statement to be highly racist because of the way it categorizes a certain race in a certain way.
              Relating Ethnic and Racial Identity Development to Teaching provides a comprehensive look at the different stages of ethnic awareness and types of teachers. Some of the statements made seemed like over simplified generalizations: "Individuals tend to dissociate themselves from their own ethnic or racial group in preference for association with the majority group" (Hollins 185). Though I do believe individuals of this type exist, I also believe that even within the different stages there are degrees. Stage One, though broad in its criteria, would be the most extreme case of no ethnic development or awareness. I imagine this category to include individuals that perceive ethnicity as a historical concept long dead to individuals who believe that ethnic minorities are inferior in several ways. Conversely, I found Stage Six very limiting in its criteria of who is classified as a culturally balanced person.
             Ethnic Identity Development and Multicultural Education illustrates the importance of helping students develop their own identities. As an important aspect of human growth, ethnic identity provides students with a well-being and sense of completeness that will help them develop a unique and strong identity. As an educator, it is my responsibility to help them develop positive self-images. Teachers play essential roles on developing personalities and growing young minds. Teachers who promote positive images and ideas of different ethnic backgrounds are equipping their students with tools that will help them navigate through society and society's negative representations of ethnicity and race. It will allow future generations to negate racism and debunk misconceptions and stereotypes that litter today's society. As an aspiring educator, it is important that I incorporate multiculturalism in my classroom and lesson plans so I can send culturally respectful and aware people into society with the hope of bettering it.
             I found these readings fascinating. About two years ago I spent nine months traveling around Central America and I experienced what it was like to be an outsider. I thought I knew what it was like to be different but spending three months in Guatemala changed my entire perspective on what it is like to be an outsider. I barely spoke the language and I stood out like a sore thumb. I dressed different, talked different, and looked different. I had trouble with the heat, the food, and the lack of creature comforts like indoor plumbing. Some people reacted to me with curiosity, some with open disdain and hostility. I was pegged as an American the second I walked off the plane and though I am proud of that fact, in that moment I understood what it felt like to be burdened by nationality.